Royallyoutfitted.

Memoirs

April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 October 2011 December 2011 January 2012 March 2012 April 2012

Wednesday, April 02, 2008, 1:19 AM

I've been nursing bad swollen eyes since last night. I thought I needed to be alone to indulge in reminisce, all afternoon when nobody is at home. I thought I don't wish to see him. But I don't want to regret later on for isolating myself from others, and figured that having a company is a pretty not bad idea, if not better.

I used to look forward to sleep when times like these arise, cause I was positive enough to think that when I wake up the next morning, it will be a beautiful day. Now, I can hardly go to sleep. Dread to face another ugly witch-y day. And it doesn't help that I've turned into a zombie and feels that I'm having the most dull lackluster life now.

I can sense the feeling of love everywhere around me. But I just can't reach it nowadays, to share and give to the rest that I love. And so, I broke down. I cried for the feeling of loss and for a source of strength & joy to come my way again. I miss it.

I'm surrounded by killjoys, all of them poking holes in my balloon.